Sunday, May 15, 2011

Tired and weary

We have just finished moving, my job is going through a major change right now and it has seemed like there are so many demands on my time that I just cannot escape. I just read a post by my friend Amy Kersey that was refreshing.

I am honestly a bit to worn down to write much more but she captures the emotions I feel right now pretty accurately.

Monday, April 25, 2011

A New Name

What do you call your father? My boy calls me "Daddo" and it is truly precious for me to hear him say it. A few years ago my daughter began calling my mother "Eema" and we thought it was cute and all but my mom especially loved being called this special new name that Sydnee had given her. This name has become her new name. All of her grandchildren call her this now. I think I finally understand why my mom loves her new name so much.

What is in a name? What is it about being called son, daughter that changes everything? Closeness?

When my wife and I got married she took my last name. She became part of my family, she identified herself as part of my life. I don't think I could truly understand the full implications of her taking on my name. I still have not. Christ refers to us as his bride and we take on his name when we become Christians. We are called by his name. We are known by his name. We are given this new name. Does he love to hear us called by his name? Does it bring joy to him to hear us gladly accept his name? Hearing my wife referred to not by her old name but by her new name brings joy to me. Probably my least favorite thing about Facebook is that it shows her maiden name. Her old name.

What is your old name? What is the name you were formerly known by? Paul was once called by the name Saul. He took this new name that God gave him willingly and was happy to live under the new name. Saul, was the chief of sinners, he was a violent hateful man. Paul, laid down his life for Christ. Abram was renamed Abraham by God and this was a complete change in the definition of who he was. So, what is your old name?

What do you call your heavenly father? Abba? A few years back some friends of ours started calling God "Daddy" and to be honest it kind of bothered me. I think it made me feel farther away from God. Like if these friends of ours called him Daddy, my relationship with God must not be quite as precious or close as theirs.

An author I admire recently stated that she did not want to be considered a Christian any longer. She still had faith but did not want the baggage associated with the name Christian. Part of me was ok with that but there was this other little part of me that was a little bugged by this. Isn't part of becoming the bride of someone that you take on the good and the bad? My wife married all of me, she took on my name, regardless of the baggage that came with my family name.

The name of Christ is a name that carries all kinds of baggage with it. Sadly I have added negative baggage to the name of Christ very time I have been a hypocrite or done things selfishly. Christ does not turn away from me because of the baggage I have added to his name. He embraces me all the closer, he accepted it knowing fully the shame I would bring him one day. Sometimes we forget that the cross was a shameful thing. That it was a curse.

So what is your new name? Is it alcoholic, sex addict, loser or womanizer? Is it homosexual, sinner or liar? Murderer, rapist or gossip? Is it republican, democrat or libertarian? All of those sound like old names to me.

How about, son, daughter, precious one, beautiful, love? Christian?

God wants a closeness with us that is beyond the closeness of my boy calling me "Daddo." He wants a closeness that is so strong we gladly take on a new name. We embrace what it is he calls us.

Are you listening? He speaks so softly.

Friday, April 15, 2011

My ultimate mission

Today I got to share my testimonial related to how "The Power of Full Engagement" program has helped me over the past four years. It has helped me quite a bit. The most visible evidence is the weight loss I have had since then. I weigh nearly fifty pounds less than I did in the beginning of 2007!

The real difference though has to to with my ultimate mission. This is where my new story comes in. I wrote my new story as a part of the program mentioned above and. It continues to be a motivating factor in my life. If you read it below don't think I am saying that I have it all together in the areas that it mentions. I have by no means completely arrived. In a way, I see this as the thing that holds me accountable to who it is I am committed to become. Many of my friends are aware of my new story and know that they may ask me at any time if what I am doing is in alignment with my life mission, my purpose.

My New Story - It is not too late…

The Truth is I want to be the most extraordinary husband I can be. It is imperative that I fulfill my God given role to nurture the spiritual development of my wife. I work hard to develop the intimacy I have with her and remind her every day that she is beautifully and wonderfully made. I convince her with my actions that she is my most precious gift. The time I spend with her is cherished. I treat every day I have with her as the most important day of my life. I do not let the burdens of things around us affect how I treat her. I listen to her and offer help in all things without her needing to ask. I live a healthy lifestyle so that I can spend as many years as possible with her.

The Truth is I want to be the most extraordinary father I can be. It is imperative that I fulfill my God given role to nurture the spiritual development of my children. I lead them to a relationship to Christ and support the discipleship they need as they grow. With my daughter I nurture her in the understanding of what a right relationship with men is. I help the Lord to build her into a woman of God. With my sons, I work hard to teach them to be men of God and I bestow upon them a masculine spirit. I teach them how to treat women as a gentleman would. I teach them how to appropriately steward their sexuality and only to use it in the bounds of marriage. The time I spend with my children is positive encouraging time that we all look forward to. I model a healthy lifestyle to my children because I know they will follow it as they become adults. I focus energy on prolonging my lifespan so that I will be around long after my great grandchildren are born.

The Truth is I want to be a fully dedicated follower of Christ. It is imperative that I am a fully engaged Christian. I read my Bible daily and spend time in quiet reflection and prayer. I build my life on the foundation of my time with God so that he can use me in a most profound manner. I attend regular worship services where I get totally engaged in the worship without respect to denominational norms. I live life knowing that my body is a temple to the most high God, I do not let anything unclean enter the holy of holies so that I can serve God all of my days.

The Truth is I want to be an extraordinary teacher. It is imperative that I balance the areas of teaching that the Lord is developing in me. I make it a point to not get overcommitted. I work hard when the Lord gives me a new opportunity so that he can speak through me. I always act in humility when I teach so that pride will not consume me. I recognize my gifting as that and recognize that God can take them from me at any time. I listen to my students and all of the people I interact with making sure they know that they matter to me and they matter to God. By my health it is evident to my students that I believe what I teach. My health and joy draws people to me giving me an opportunity to change their lives.

The Truth is I want to be an extraordinary evangelist. It is imperative that I share the gospel. I value the lost of this world as God himself does. I seek his sheep and will take great risks to rescue them. I work to actively build relationships with the people I come into contact with in order that I may have an opportunity to invite them into the Kingdom. I prioritize this area of development in my life out of the recognition of my purpose on this earth. I cherish the people who’s souls I am the steward of and look forward to seeing them in heaven. I am always careful to avoid pride and to never accept my mission as finished. I work hard to prolong my lifespan so that all of the people God wants me to invite to his table get invited and then I am finally brought home to be with him.

All of this is possible, it is not too late."




Thursday, April 14, 2011

Building a race car

I have many fond childhood memories of building and racing soap box derby cars. My dad decided that he wanted his kids to race soap box derby cars so he shared this dream with anyone who would listen. Eventually he had people from various churches in the state of Minnesota convinced that this would be a great way to make a difference in our communities.

I can remember working late into the night with my dad at the elementary school to build that first soap box derby car. Old 200. I remember when he asked me what number it was going to have I said "200" because that was a bigger number than I could count to. I was not very old. We painted the car yellow and blue. If you are imagining some sleek torpedo shaped car where barely the top of a helmet is seen when occupied by the driver you have the wrong image in mind. It was a wedge shaped box and when you pressed the brakes the spoiler would tilt as if to say "goodbye sucker." It had wheels from a morgue gurney on it which was sort of morbid except for the fact that they were very fast, today they have made their way back onto the gurney that sits in my workshop.  It has not retired completely despite its 100+ years of age. It holds power tools.

Tonight, I will be working with my kids to finish building their cars for the big race. We will spend most of our time at the band-saw that sits on top of that gurney. The wheels are still blue and yellow and every time I see this connection to my dad I smile. I hope he gets to read this blog post. Having such a good dad is part of what made me love being a dad so much.

The pinewood/grand prix race will be on Saturday at Mountain View Wesleyan Church. Come on out and cheer on your favorite kid.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

I love being a Dad.

A friend of mine mentioned the idea of putting a blog together that is written specifically from the perspective of being a dad. I love being a dad. I love knowing that the things I instill in my children will make a difference in the world to come. That my influence on them is permanent and lasting.

I have four kids (3 boys and a girl) and they are so smart and beautiful, they get both traits from their mother. Sometimes when life is just busy and crazy and there is too much going on and not enough of me to go around I just take a few minutes and sit in my chair with the littlest one squeezed into the chair next to me. I love feeling him sitting right beside me. Just enjoying each other's presence and knowing that even if for just that moment everything is ok. The world can keep on moving, the bills can keep coming, the demands of life can keep yelling for me... But I don't have to pay attention to any of it. My little boy has my attention.

Sometimes I imagine that the feelings he has about sitting next to me overflows and I feel it too, like my heavenly father is sitting there and I am his child soaking up the presence of Daddo. His strength propping me up, making me feel safe.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Offended Yet?

The past couple of weeks have been very interesting in the realm of freedom of speech. With the n-word thing and Dr. Laura and now this week the church that wishes to burn the Quran, I thought it would be a good time to write some comments and collect my thoughts on this freedom.

http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2010/09/08/vatican-quran-burning-outrageous/

Friday, October 16, 2009

The place I find myself in...

Realizing that standing on the edge of need is the safest place for my relationship with God. Having an empty bucket and giving God all it holds, even the potential it has to hold. Not because he needs it but because he can use it.

Recently I found myself at the end of my rope. Financially, life was going as poorly as it has ever gone. The Lord in his graciousness provided miraculously. Humbled as even the source was something that was outside my comfort zone. We stand now with needs remaining but just enough to keep us dependent upon him.

We owe it all to him.